A menu with memories | Economic Times

Fans of Parsi food, who are n’t Parsi themselves, are often surprised not to find dhansak at wedding feasts. The reason is that dhansak is traditionally made after a death and would seem inauspicious at weddings. Parsis must find it simply logical to save such a satisfying dish for those moments when their mood most needs lifting. Foods and funerals are closely linked. When many mourners gather, often from far, they get hungry. Since the immediate family may be too grief-stricken to cook, food is brought by friends or caterers. Lisa Rogak’s cookbook Death Warmed Over gathers such recipes from around the world. They tend to be stews that keep well or sweets that give energy and comfort. Northern England’s funeral biscuits and Dutch funeral cakes allow the dead to be commemorated through their initials iced on top. Food is also meant for the dead. In many cultures, death is seen as the start of a journey, and journeys need food for the way. Food has often been sent along with the dead, from the plentiful provisions placed in tombs by the ancient Egyptians and Chinese, to the simple flatbreads called ‘johnnycakes’ (journey cakes) placed in coffins in Jamaica. Combining the food for the dead and those mourning them can make for memorable feasts. In Jean Bottero’s The Oldest Cuisine in the World, which really describes the oldest foods decipherable from records, the cuneiform tablets of Mesopotamia, he translates a tablet from the Akkadian king Ammisaduqa (1646-1626 B.C.). First it invokes the departed spirits of specific communities, but then generously goes on to invoke all those “not recorded on this tablet, and the soldiers who fell while on perilous campaigns for their lord: Princes, princesses, all ‘persons’ from East to West who have [no one to take care of you…]: Come ye, eat this, drink this and bless Ammisaduqa (who is offering it to you).” Foods like eggs and seeds may feature at funerals as a promise of life renewed after death. Jewish funerals can feature hard-boiled eggs, while Eastern Orthodox Christians make kolyva, boiled whole grains of wheat sweetened with honey. Greeks add pomegranate seeds which links kolyva to the legend of Persephone and the pomegranate seeds she ate that bound her to Hades, god of the dead. Above all, we remember the departed through their favourite foods. This can take ritualised form, as when such dishes are placed in a room, then the doors are closed to let the spirits feast. But it is notable how even with orthodox Hindus, this is the one time when people may bend the rules and sneak in meat dishes or alcohol if the dead person loved it, which would otherwise not be part of rituals. At a time when the cruelties of Covid have both increased the need to mourn, yet forbidden us from doing it properly, making such favourite foods at home can still allow the dead and the living to share a final meal.